The mere idea of jumping into an online conversation with your company's worst detractors would make just about anybody cringe (or want to hide under a rock), especially if they seem hell-bent on openly ridiculing your company at any cost. Dealing with nightmare detractors effectively requires some of those very human skills you've learned during your tenure as a netizen. In other words, you'll have to call on the communication skills you learned at your favorite message board, social networking site or blog--and not necessarily the skills you've acquired from your marketing career.

It's been my experience that those who attack companies online rarely do so for their own sheer enjoyment. Usually they have some sort of axe to grind. Moreover, I've found that those rare individuals who do go after companies without a compelling reason are self-correcting. That is, their own behavior will cause them to destroy themselves in the court of public opinion. More on that in a bit.

Most people who are ticked off at your company are mad because of an experience they've had--maybe they think they got ripped off at some point in the past, or they had a bad experience with customer service, or they felt the product they bought didn't live up to expectations. Your first job is to find out what they're upset about.

I also find it rare that a detractor won't tell you exactly why he is angry, when asked publicly in an Internet forum about why he thinks your company stinks. Anyone who won't tell you why he's posting negative things about your company puts himself in a really poor position; other people will see that there's a lack of substance behind his ranting, and will likely begin to dismiss the detractor's comments before too long.

But as I said, most people will tell you exactly what they think is wrong with your company. You need to be empowered to respond to any points they bring up, and you need to do it in a constructive fashion. Here are some dos and don'ts:

Dos

• Respond to criticisms point by point without dodging issues.
• Speak like a human being.
• Bring others from your company into the conversation if you believe they have a relevant opinion or information that you might not have.
• Appeal to what a reasonable human being would think and believe. Your detractor might suggest entirely unreasonable remedies for making things better. Since you're engaging him publicly, you can appeal to more reasonable and realistic alternatives.
• Always be constructive. It is not just possible, but probable that there will be detractors looking to bait you into a public meltdown. Keep your chin up and don't let people push your buttons.

Don'ts

• Don't post substance-free PR or marketing-speak.
• Don't make statements that can't be backed up. If you don't have needed information at your fingertips when you're responding, either get your hands on it or acknowledge that you don't have the information, but will get it within a reasonable timeframe.
• Don't attempt to suppress opinions or tune people out. You will fail.
• Don't back people into corners. Always give them options. Your goal is to arrive at a reasonable compromise and extend an olive branch, not to prove somebody wrong in a debate.

As you might imagine, there's no tactic or rule of the road that is applicable 100 percent of the time in an online discussion. These things tend to vary with the situation. But there is an overarching principle we all need to remember in Conversational Marketing - people respond to a human voice a heck of a lot better than they do to the voice of the PR department (or legal department) in your company. So keep things on a human level.

And please come share your favorite approaches to Conversational Marketing on the Spin blog. We'd love to hear from you.

This commentary is insightful. I recommend it to others.