Just An Online Minute... Where Can You Find Sex, Women, And Charity In This Town?
Party Time, New York
Planning that big summer blowout? Send your invitations to email@example.com and get the Just An Online Minute treatment!
This week I'm endurance training for Internet Week (also, Dr. Freud would love that I typed in "Intervention Week" first. Would that be Freud? Anyway.). A girl's gotta work those smile lines, those expressions of interest for when someone says "I have this great prototype! You type a sentence into a window" *pauses, looks around for information brokers* "...and you send it... to everyone!", and mini food avoidance strategies in preparation for one of the most boozy, banter filled, big ideas (or just big mouths) weeks of the summer. How am I cross-training in the off season? Here, let's run this lap together...
Today is a day of rest, where we'll hydrate, shake off some cynicism (but not all of it, we must stay realistic!), work on the energy-stabilizing mantra (mine is something like "you don't feel your toes, but nobody knows"), and place mini-burgers in front of our faces for five minutes without eating them. Seriously, try it, it's hard and effective.
Tomorrow, Tuesday May 25, is the always-fabulous, always champagne-burbled, always surprise-celebrity-doused New York Women In Film And Television Designing Women Awards. Attendees are from all over the entertainment industry world and honorees span everything from pants to perms to purple puckers. This year's show is at Macy's, which I only go to when there aren't any holidays or tourists around. So never. So I'm excited to see if it's changed in the past 5 years. When covering this event in the past, I have been tickled with surprises like The Dude's nemesis, a Gossip Girl, a "Law & Order" legend, and what seems like a million years ago, Ed Burns. This year I'll be arriving with a blond on each arm and trying to get face time with TV's greatest mom, Clair Huxtable.
Wednesday, May 26, is going to be less about the sprint, more about the marathon as Tremor Media throws a huge first-viewing bash for "Sex and The City" at Clearview Chelsea Cinema. Oh can it, I know it's campy, I know SJP moves her head in a serpentine motion with every phrase, but guess what? I haven't been to a lame Tremor party yet, and with another costume competition (best Mr. Big costumes included, gents), I predict party success for these folks yet again. I'm bringing the Charlotte to my Elizabeth Taylor, Buddy Media's Jenean Chapman. I don't think Carrie or any of the other gals wore sweatpants and flipflops, so I'm stressing a little in the costume department. If these were a Carl from Aquateen Hunger Force competition, I'd be golden.
Thursday May 27, is...wait for it... Digital DUMBO! This time around The JAR Group, DumboNYC.com, and the Brooklyn Community Foundation are gathering DUMBO lovers together to announce a donation program so you can put your DUMBO love duckets where your doughnut chomper is. Translation: love BK local? Donate some dang cash to local nonprofits. Another translation? Use your profits to help those who don't profit to absolve yourself for those caviar-soaked dinners you hosted when drumming up that VC dough.
Friday May 28, you'll be reading about Thursday's awesomeness while I pick my Ohio parentals up from LGA to squire them all around this big beautiful city for Memorial Day Weekend. The weather is forecast to be gorgeous, so we'll probably end up freezing and cursing the day Sam Champion was born (is he even on anymore?). What about you? Big work plans for this week? Or are you heading out of Dodge when the clock hits 3 p.m. today?
Also... I kind of want to dress up as an obscure character from SATC and I am taking your suggestions in the comments below :)
Keep those invitations coming - firstname.lastname@example.org