Commentary
Just An Online Minute... I Have Five Passes To A Private Concert And I Want You To Have Them!
- by Kelly Samardak , August 3, 2010
Janelle Monae "Now You Can't Say You Never Win Anything" Contest
Update 2:59p.m. EST on 8.10.2010 the contest is officially for REAL closed - Brandon is the final winner!
UPDATE 2:42p.m. EST on 8.10.2010- strikethroughs added for extra super
obviousness
UPDATE 11:00a.m. EST 8.10.2010 contest reopened- first person to submit their poem (see rules below) wins the
newly released to the wild ticket +1!
*Contest is closed! Congratulations to the winners!* (edited 12:59p.m.
EST)
I NEVER WIN ANYTHING. So, of course, the one time I do, I get one of those invitations I hope for -- a night of live music, cocktails, and snackies. Well guess what? As Cyprus Hill would say "We Ain't Goin' Out Like That!" and what this means to you is: I convinced the organizers to hand me five hot and spicy invitations to give away to YOU and a guest of your choosing. But, you're going to have to work for it...
1: The artist at the center of the contest is Janelle Monae, a name I keep seeing popping up on Twitter, sometimes in the company of listings that include Best Coast, another hot "I saw them FIRST" name drop of the moment. If you're curious before you decide you want to enter this contest, might I offer this video for your viewing pleasure?
B: The host of the party is ScanScout "a technology-driven video ad network."
VVII: The event is on Aug. 11 at 7 p.m. in NYC at The Edison Ballroom. So, obviously, the contest is only open to people in NYC that day.
Note: You're probably wondering why I am not going. Believe me, I would LOVE to go, but I actually won a contest to see Gov't Mule in the VIP Section at Central Park Summerstage. Otherwise, I would be in the audience with you, sipping cocktails, chasing down hors d'oeuvres, and enjoying not only a private sassy performance by Janelle Monae but also a DJ set by none other than NYC mainstay DJ ?uestLove.
Ready for the contest rules? I like to be entertained, so they're good. And if no one submits, I'm going to be embarassed beyond words. Or maybe Janelle Monae should be. Anyway, here's how you win:
The first five people to submit, via the comments section for this column (directly on it, not via Twitter at me, not via email about the column, you get it!) a poem including the following words wins:
- ScanScout
- Samardak
- Janelle Monae
- Weinerdog
Got it?
BIG FAT NOTE: You MUST be reachable via email (usually linked to in your MediaPost profile) so I can tell the lovely people at ScanScout who so easily went along with my contest idea!
BIGGER FATTER NOTE: Don't be a jerk, no one wants to read an offensive poem. Pretend you're going to read it out loud to someone else's granny.
GOOD LUCK!
Update 2:59p.m. EST on 8.10.2010 the contest is officially for REAL closed - Brandon is the final winner!
UPDATE 2:42p.m. EST on 8.10.2010- strikethroughs added for extra super obviousness
UPDATE 11:00a.m. EST 8.10.2010 contest reopened- first person to submit their poem (see rules below) wins the newly released to the wild ticket
+1!
*Contest is closed! Congratulations to the winners!* (edited 12:59p.m. EST)
I looked all over for ScanScout
I wanted to know what it was all about
But instead I found Kelly Samardak
And found out she was not whack
Because she had tickets to see Janelle Monae
And wanted to see what others had to say
So I had to chime in and get out of the fog
So I don't have to stay home on the 11th with my Weinerdog
oh my goodness. We have one winner! 4 more tickets to go! Good job Kailei. And even though I'm expecting it, seeing "weinerdog" still makes me laugh.
Weinerdog me with
a Scanscout ritz a la Janelle Monae
w/o the Samardak myth
who knows what to blog & say?
Leonard - first, put the pipe down. Next, pat yourself on the back! you get ticket #2!
So they say this ScanScout is the real;
'They're Hot!', K. Samardak gives us the seallll...
...of approval, and she'll sayyyy...
'Who else would have Janelle Monaeeee...
at their party? Hold the phone,
Let's get it goin',
No time for B.S.
No time for weinerdoggin' ::)
I'm like ScanScout cus video girls know I guarantee results you other Weinerdog's are on the way out. I'm in Myspace's office bout to pull a Kanye, Monae of this music but Janelle is still the entree. Screen shots to movie screens, I'm know to do it all. Samardak checked the watch and it's so bright it could even lighten up Aresnio Hall. Kenjizee.
I breakdance in the subway. On the tracks.
Kinetic applause and energy from this commuter. Her name is Samardak.
She loved my Weinerdog dance over beats by Janelle Monae. Filmed by ScanScout.
Headed to auditions for "So You Think You Can Dance".
Major clout.
I am not disappointed. I knew my readers were master lyricists and poets.
ScanScout just make me wanna scream and shout
The thought of Samardak got me flippin back
But Janelle Monae she is definitely on the money…honey
So don’t be a Weinerdog and get out that fog!
"What is ScanScout?" I said with a pout. "Won't somebody tell me?" and then I found Kelly.
Kelly Samardak searched the media and could not succeed-ia! She thought that was it, but then thought for an "online minute."
Janelle Monae is my favorite singer and she also likes to dance.
ScanScout drives superior ad performance for big and little brands!
I told Kelly that I'd pay for lunch, but not to be a hog. She got offended and gave a hug to her tiny Weinerdog... His name was Oscar Meyer!
this contest is closed! Winners are
Kenji Summers
Shirley Toussaint
Harold Cabezas
Leonard Zachary
Kailei Richardson
Maybe you guys want to take N Wiggins and Elizabeth Romero as your +1s? :)
As I trolled CPW one rainstormy night
A celebrity spotting turned the gloomy clouds bright:
What the hey, says I,
Is that Janelle Monae, walking her weinerdog?
Bejeweled collar she sported (the dog, not Monae)
And after I lauded JM on the way
that she sings
I had to ask where she located that designer dog bling.
Monae said, “an ad, delivered by ScanScout.
I was on the MTV site giving Gaga a shout-out,
when I saw it and thought my fido must be decked out.”
I said “that’s great, I’m a marketer interactive,
And I will give the scoop to Samardak, hoping I can win it-
Her contest, I mean, on Just an Online Minute!”
Can't believe I was 3 minutes too late!
Karma, you are a worthy competitor, you should be proud. Next time!
Attention Karma Martell. Bob Barker says, come on doooown on August. 11th, please be my plus one. I enjoyed reading your raps/television pitch, lol. :D
Hey Shirley,
Thanks a lot! Very sporting of you. And thanks Kelly for the hat tip.
Awesome rhymes! I especially enjoyed Leonard's.
There one was a man named weinerdog.
He loved to lay on his fave wood log
He worked at scanscout, there was no doubt
But he almost got fired today
Luckily he listened to Janelle Monae
He would listened to her to his grave (ae)
It was all well and good, until Samadark heard the wood
And now streets are what he must pave