Happy Birthday, Mark Zuckerberg, You Smug S.O.B.
Sometimes you read a piece of news that just deflates your ego for the rest of the day. Today Mark Zuckerberg, whom you may recall founded a popular social network known as the Facebook, is turning 28 years old. This comes just a couple weeks after my own birthday, when I turned a somewhat larger number. Mark Zuckerberg is about to lead his company into an IPO valuing it at $100 billion; I received an ice cream maker which I am very pleased with.
But I don’t want Mark to get the idea that his age and accomplishments make him in any way unique or special. To take him down a couple notches on his birthday, following is a quick review of what some famous historical personages have accomplished by the same age.
Alexander the Great: After assuming the throne in 336 BCE at the age of 20 (having possibly connived in the murder of his own father) Alexander III of Macedon went on to conquer the vast Persian Empire, including the modern countries of Turkey, Syria, Lebanon, Israel, Egypt, Iraq and Iran, by the age of 28. Along the way he became a god-king and modestly founded 18 cities named after himself, as well as one named after his horse. Cities named after Mark Zuckerberg: 0.
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart: Born in 1756, at the age of six Mozart began a multi-year tour of Europe, giving private concerts for the Austrian Emperor in Vienna as well as royal courts in Prague, Paris, London, Munich, and elsewhere. He wrote his first symphony when he was eight and his first opera when he was 14. By the age of 28, Mozart had written some of his most famous works, including his piano concertos and the Mass in C minor, and was about to compose operas including The Marriage of Figaro and Don Giovanni. Operas composed by Mark Zuckerberg: 0.
Pablo Picasso: Born in 1881, by the age of 28 Picasso had helped invent Cubism with his breakthrough painting Les Demoiselles d’Avignon, finished in 1907. Although the painting, which depicted prostitutes apparently wearing tribal masks, was considered immoral and wasn’t displayed publicly until 1916, it laid the groundwork for much of 20th century modern art. Artistic movements founded by Mark Zuckerberg: 0.