From the NSA's Notebooks
Since 2010, the National Security Agency has been exploiting its huge collections of data to create sophisticated graphs of some Americans’ social connections that can identify their associates, their locations at certain times, their traveling companions and other personal information, according to newly disclosed documents and interviews with officials. – The New York Times, September 28, 2013
Classified: Social Dynamics Data-Gathering Initiative, Preliminary Assay
Study Period: July-September 2013
Network appears dominated by sharing images of domestic animals, specifically cats. Images of cats represent 57% of all content shared by subject over study period, 72% of all content shared with subject. Queries: why cats? Are images of cats form of coded communication? What is subtext of cats? Text appended to images of cats often nonsensical, misspelled. Suspicious, further investigation required.
20% of all messages sent by subject incorporate acronyms/abbreviations, interspersed with fragmentary words and phrases apparently at random. Ex: “OMG LOL WTF totes ridic but hey YOLO.” Another attempt to encode hidden messages? Symptom of emergent psychosis? Urgently need cross ref with national database pharmacy records, firearm sales.
Large number of messages sent from workplace computer. Frequency and volume of messages leave no time for other activities, subject has covertly disabled internal workplace monitoring of online activity, suggesting workplace is front/cover operation. Require direct surveillance of workplace for further information.
Surprising volume of late-night communications. Hypothesis: communication with confederates in other time zones? Hypothesis disproved: all recipients in same geographic locale. Ex: “Hey QT RU up? ;-)” Unusual: multiple recipients messaged almost simultaneously, all of opposite gender. Photographs of sender attached to 31% of text messages. Ex: [redacted] [redacted] [redacted]