Commentary

Mars Rover Tweets Landing

“… in true Twitter fashion, even Curiosity was able to sound off on its landing. The rover has its own verified Twitter account: @MarsCuriosity” -- Los Angeles Times 

MarsCuriosity: Boy I wanted this gig so bad but I am starting to have second thoughts.

MarsCuriosity: Everyone told me it was such a great chance. Big breakthrough. But you know what: being a rover kinda sucks.

MarsCuriosity: It started during the trip here. 352 million miles, 8.5 mos. I don’t think the NASA engineers realize #infiniteinkyblacknessofspace can be, well… depressing. And boring.

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MarsCuriosity: Landing was no walk in the park either. Air braking @ 13,000mph, supersonic parachutes, retrothrusters, finally lowered down on a skyhook: um NASA could u make this more complicated please? Jeez.

MarsCuriosity: I guess I should just be glad they didn’t mix up inches and centimeters like that one time. Doubt anyone even remembers poor #MarsClimateOrbiter? RIP MCO. It’s tough being a rover.

MarsCuriosity: Had a look around. Want my description of Mars? #Red #dusty #empty. They said there might be water and life – I was picturing something like Palm Springs. Nuh uh.

MarsCuriosity: Now they’re all partying to celebrate the safe landing. MY safe landing, but no champagne up here naturally – wouldn’t fit with all the precious instrumentation.

MarsCuriosity: I mean yes they Skyped to congratulate me, but it just made me more depressed: they’re all back home drinking PBR and making out while I sit silent and motionless on a vast, sandy plain. 
 
MarsCuriosity: Has that ever happened to you, where you start a new job and find out you have nothing to do on your first day? So you end up goofing off on social all day? Wondering what you’re supposed to do? Yeah, that’s me right now.

MarsCuriosity: Checked into Mars on Foursquare. Spirit and Opportunity are fighting for #MayorofMars.

MarsCuriosity: Met up with the other rovers. Nice guys but I just don’t feel that connected to them. For one thing they are retired. All they want to do is smoke pot and lie out in the sun getting charged.

MarsCuriosity: #RobotSigh. I dunno. Maybe things will get better when the engineers sober up and send me some orders. Most rovers probably feel this way at first.  I think it will be alright. At least, I hope so.

MarsCuriosity: Night is falling. It gets so cold here.

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