• by Richard Whitman , Columnist, November 12, 2013

We're all very familiar with the advertising industry's love for made-up, silly names for the latest trends, new-fangled titles and agency names. While an agency named The Marketing Arm, a newly formed entity of Australia's Clemenger Group, might not sound too strange--though it does conjure images of flailing appendages--the fact that the agency is being dubbed a "matched agenda" agency does. What's "matched agenda?" According to Managing Director Marcus Ingleby, “Matched agenda marketing means we bring all sides of the equation together for our clients. We create strategies to simultaneously meet the needs of the brand, the retailer and the shopper.” Oh we get it. You mean integrated. Why didn't you just say that?

So, help me out here. What makes a hire "strategic?" We see agencies lauding the fact they've made "strategic hires" all the time. Does that mean sometimes they make un-strategic hires? You know, like hire people for no apparent reason just because someone raised their hand and said they needed a job? I'd like to think all hires are strategic meaning you don't actually have to call a hire strategic. Because by calling a hire strategic, you're admitting you've made stupid hires in the past. All of which may be true but why admit it by using the word strategic? Anyway...SapientNitro Toronto has made four...wait for it...strategic hires as it expands operations in Canada. Brent Farrell joins the agency as vp client services, Howard Goldkrand joins as director of innovation, Andrew Light joins as vp of strategy and George Panopoulos joins as vp of client services. Two points to anyone who can identify why these are not the most strategic hires SapientNitro could have made.

And speaking of strange names, when we receive a press release which carries the headline, "Timeless Trends Corsets Announces Partnership with Austin Marketing Agency Space Chimp Media," what are we supposed to think? What would you think? A bunch of chimps dressed in corsets plan to march to SXSW? A new lingerie brand is designing corsets for space traveling chimpanzees? This headline is some kind of contender for 25 Unintentionally Funny Newspaper Headlines. This being advertising, though, oddity and company names that make no sense are the norm. So it wasn't too long before we figured out a steel-boned corset maker named Timeless Trends has named Space Chimp Media its new advertising agency. And that is, as they say, that.

McCann Worldgroup is high-fiving it up after it was dubbed the 3rd most Creatively Awarded Network with McCann Melbourne being named the most Creatively Awarded Agency. McCann Melbourne also scored Most Awarded Campaign for its brilliant Dumb Ways to Die effort for Metro Trains Australia. Congrats, mates.

I want to be PJ Pereira. Why? Because the dude now has two offices in Brazil. Two! One in Sao Paulo and, most recently, one in Rio de Janeiro. Hey, it's Brazil we're talking about here. Land of gorgeous people and endlessly gorgeous weather (except when it rains). Anyway, Pereira & O'Dell has placed Michael Lent, the agency's managing director in Brazil in charge of both the Sao Paulo office as well as the new Rio de Janeiro office. The move follows the agency's B2W Digital win. B2W is Latin America's largest online retailer.