It Slices, It Dices...It's The Amazing Internet of Things, Now Appearing

I don’t know all about the Internet of things, except that it will happen gradually, or all of a sudden. Video seems to be such a little part of it, even if at the moment, we use the Internet to access video pretty much constantly.

But plain old video is so unimaginative.

You might have seen that Google is playing around with a “smart” contact lens that can help diabetes sufferers measure their glucose level. That’s awesome, and important news for the estimated 382 million people around the world who suffer from diabetes. The soft contact lens has a sensor that measures the glucose levels in tears. A  pinhole in the lens lets tear fluid seep over the glucose monitor to get readings. That information gets delivered to a monitor, and, well, there you go.

It’s about as far away from anything you’d think Google would be doing, or that you ever imagined a microchip, or your own eye, could be used for. Amazing. What next, a Google Bass-o-Matic?



There’s also news of a new Google Glass app that help improve sex, which if it wasn’t sex and subject to lots of hang ups , would get universal acclaim by improving something human beings do, and apparently would like to get better at doing. (Practice, practice, practice!)  

A couple, both wearing glasses and using the app, could allow them to watch themselves in action, or, according to the story I read, ask Google for suggestions about new things to try, have Google Glass programmed to dim the lights and play mood music. After the sexual interlude, Sex with Glass (that’s what it’s called) will keep a video memory of the event, but just for five hours. Months ago, somebody cooked up what was then called the First Ever Google Glass Porn, which, thankfully, is funnier than it is raunchy (but it is kind of raunchy and NSW unless everybody else has taken a snow day).

Today, there’s this cautionary story about the exciting prospect of having cars that drive themselves. That sounds great, and the whole car/Internet deal was huge news at CES. Cool beans! Then I read this at the    

On a future road trip, your robot car decides to take a new route, driving you past a Krispy Kreme Doughnut shop. A pop-up window opens on your car’s display and asks if you’d like to stop at the store. ‘Don’t mind if I do,’ you think to yourself. You press ‘yes’ on the touchscreen, and the autonomous car pulls up to the shop.

You have guessed where this road is heading. Most of it anyway. Your autonomous car can collect data, and it would know you’re a fast food soft touch. Your GPS might also suggest routes that will take you past an advertiser’s store, or even to a suburban mall area that is just a little off that road you will not be taking.

“Say there are multiple routes to your destination,” the author imagines. “ Some may be shorter in terms of distance but longer in terms of travel time, or some routes are equidistant. In those cases, there’s no obviously “right” route to take, but advertiser money could be a “plus factor” that’s just enough to tip driving algorithms in their direction.” If your car is in auto-drive, this story suggests, perhaps advertising can drift over the windshield as you motor along.

The funny/scary part is that while most of the scenarios above are set in the future, the future comes pretty quickly. A Google Glass wearer reports that a few days ago the FBI (maybe) accosted him inside a suburban Columbus, Ohio movie theater, suspecting him of trying to use the device to pirate a copy of a “Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit” he was at the theater to watch. Like I said, it’s a funny world.     

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