Commentary

Saatchi & Saatchi's Kevin Roberts Says Marketing Is Now All About Table Licking

Hmm. First, TV was dead. Then advertising was dead. Now, according to Saatch & Saatchi Worldwide CEO Kevin -- aka Mr. Lovemarks -- Roberts, marketing is dead. Now it's all about creating a "movement." Yeah, that sounds about right. The kind of movement one makes when they visit the bathroom. 

But Roberts is a bit more eloquent saying: “You do that by figuring out how you add mystery, sensuality and intimacy to a brand. Sensuality: we feel the world in five senses. Whether you like this room or not, [the architect] Antonio Citterio designed it and all five senses are at work in here. I mean, people want to lick this table.”

What. The. Actual. F*ck?

If Lovemarks wasn't crazy enough, now Roberts wants us to go around licking the brands we love. What is up with that, dude?

Apparently, though, his followers at the agency love him. One such follower put it thusly: “His personality does not transfer to paper. He overdoses on the bullshit massively, but he is a great leader and without him Saatchi & Saatchi would probably not exist.”

Overdoses on bullshit. Yeah, that sounds about right.

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