'The Onion' Takes On Celeb Media With StarWipe

Having invented a whole new category of media with The Onion’s mock journalism, and skewered click-bait tripe with ClikcHole, publisher Onion, Inc. is moving on to the torrid, vacant miasma that is celebrity gossip. It is launching its own gossip Web site: StarWipe.

According to the publisher, StarWipe “will supply a constant stream of scurrilous, invasive information on the lives of the rich and famous through riveting articles, slideshows, and videos,” covering “what’s most important in the least important part of American culture.”

StarWipe editor Sean O’Neal stated: “The world of celebrity reporting is currently a garish cacophony of carefully presented artifice, publicist spin, empty innuendo, and outright lies. We thought we’d add to that.”

A sampling of StarWipe content at launch includes headlines like “Baby Bump Watch: George Clooney” and “Pink Opens Up About Eating Meat Again And, By God, We’re Going to Squeeze 400 Words Out of It.”

In good gossipy fashion, StarWipe will distribute its content via social media platforms, including Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and Tumblr. Readers can also sign up to receive an email newsletter.

On a separate, somewhat serious note, The Onion has also been pioneering native advertising with the Onion Labs, which will doubtless contribute vacuous trash incompatible with human dignity to StarWipe on behalf of advertising clients.

Back in May, The Atlantic reported that native ads produced by Onion Labs make up 81% of the company’s total revenue -- and that’s no joke.

Next story loading loading..