• by Barbara Lippert , Columnist, August 26, 2024

“Wanna know a secret?”  a young woman standing in her bathroom wearing a sports bra and underpants asked this spring in a groundbreakingly earthy commercial for Secret Whole Body Deodorant.

Without waiting for an affirmative, and without self-consciousness, she moved in close to the camera, unfurled her pits and declared, “More than just my armpits stink!”

Some people thought the lady came on a little strong, but a sudden copping to full body stinkitude, along with listing all the various reeking human parts, seemed to be part of the territory of the great body deodorant ad wars of 2024.

Now, in a series of cross-promotions with “Beetlejuice Beetlejuice” -- the movie sequel to Tim Burton’s 1988 classic, “Beetlejuice," in theaters nationwide Sept. 6 -- Secret has upped the ante, proving that almost everything is funnier when said in the dead air and extenuating circumstances of the afterlife.

And you don’t have to know anything about the convoluted script of the original movie, or the sequel -- or even who the Michael Keaton character with the wormy hair, whitewashed face and necrotic striped suit is -- to enjoy these Secret women’s deodorant shorties, but it does add to the fun.

In one 15-second spot, a blonde with a 1950’s bouffant hairdo echoes the original “more than my pits stink” spot when she says “If you’re like me, more than just your top half stinks.”

As it turns out, this attractive blond is quite affecting for a ghoul. Her head and torso sit upright on the couch while her neatly (surgically?) separated lower limbs follow their own path to the side of the sofa.

“So I use Secret deodorant on my most sensitive areas,” she says, while getting a better grip on her amputated thighs.

It turns out that making a commercial product-heavy, talking about the benefits in a very frank, straightforward way, when the user is some sort of poltergeist, is comedy gold.

In a 30-second promo, we hear “Next!” And then, “No offense, but your body odor smells like death,” the blonde, her updo now consisting of attractive roses fashioned from hair, says to the new arrival plopped into the couch’s middle cushion.

“I died on a camping trip,” the newbie responds. “Aren’t I supposed to stink? “

“That’s where you’re dead wrong,” the ghost-in-the-know says, as she holds up the spray bottle and asks “Would you mind getting my legs?”  Meanwhile, the limbs are crossing themselves on the other end of the sofa, and the newest apparition obliges, spraying the pedal extremities as they pump to their own rhythm.  

As for “Beetlejuice” 2, it seems to pick up the pieces from where it left off. This time, Jenna Ortega (“Wednesday”) is the perfect heir apparent, as she plays Astrid, the daughter of Wynona Ryder’s character, Lydia. Their interplay is perfect.

“Ghosts aren't real. Only gullible people believe that kind of crap,” Astrid announces in the middle of the movie trailer before she -- ouch -- gets taken hostage by ghosts. Beetlejuice then makes his grand return summoned by Lydia, who asks him to help save Astrid.

In the first full length trailer, there’s a clip set to a children's choir's rendition of Harry Belafonte's “Day-O (The Banana Boat Song)," a callback to one of the most iconic scenes in the original film. Jenna Ortega’s character, out biking, unknowingly summons Beetlejuice. “The juice is loose,” Michael Keaton as Beetlejuice says. He tells Wynona’s Lydia that he’ll never lie to her, as his striped suit sets itself afire.

The movie looks perfectly Burtonesque and packed with comic detail. 

Still, no matter what the temperature becomes among morticians, funeral arrangers, or returning characters, the Secret cross-promotion holds its own in the eau-de-afterlife.