• by George Simpson , Featured Contributor, June 12, 2006

A survey released last week by Siemens Communications Inc. suggests that many Americans are eager to use cell phones for e-mail, music, video, and other new applications. "Especially among younger people, it appears that customers are ahead of cell phone companies in devising new applications," said a Siemens bigwig.

Since this, like most commissioned studies, tends to cast the position of the underwriting company in a strongly favorable light (think the study would have been released if users said "making a call is perfectly sufficient"?) we decided a little man-on-the-street follow-up was necessary to confirm that teens want new cell phone features.

Seventeen-year-old, Rye, N.Y.: "I want an auto-redial feature that leaves a voice mail that says, 'I am so NOT talking to you right now.' That would be a real time-saver."

Eighteen-year-old from Garden City, N.Y.: "I wish I could put my cell on the dashboard and have it give me a ringtone like 'I Shot the Sheriff' when I hit a radar zone."

Fifteen-year-old from Calabasas, Calif.: "I'd like to be able to scan in exam questions so I can text them to my friends in the library. My thumbs get really tired having to manually enter them now."

Fifteen-year-old from Hartford, Conn.: "I want a cell phone that will tell me if surveillance cameras in the mall are fixed on me. That'd be a big help."

Nineteen-year-old, Park City, Utah: "I want a countdown bar, like the battery indicator, that tells me when I am running out of 'anytime' minutes and I'll have to pay back my Dad for the calls that go over the plan."

Fourteen-year-old, Lexington, Va.: "I want built-in text copy that I can insert into messages with real phrases like "Oh, my god!"; "So totally"; "She is SUCH a bitch"; and "Promise me you won't tell anyone else, but..."

Fifteen-year-old, Chicago: "I want a phone that has different background noises, like crowds at a football game or class period change bells that you can switch on, so my parents won't know where I really am when they call."

Eighteen-year-old, Miami: "I want a wire extension that projects my cell screen on my glasses so I can play 'Bejeweled' without looking down during Earth Science. Man, that class really sucks. And I know that fascist teacher totally hates me."

Fifteen-year-old from New Canaan, Conn.: "I want a voice filter that makes it sound like I'm sober when I call my parents."

Sixteen-year-old from Houston: "I need to be able to block my ex-boyfriend's text and voice calls. He is driving me crazy. You know I tol' him it was O-Vah, but he don't listen."