KFC's most recent online video push, in which it introduces us to three of its nicest, proudest cooks, is so baffling. It's the first series in some time that, above all else, poses an existential dilemma: Why is this here? Who is the intended audience? Is there some judgmental subset of fast-food diners that insists on decency and diligence in their restaurant stewards?

I wonder how many brands -- specifically, how many brands using video to reinforce identities forged long ago -- are quite as gallant, brave, enlightened, thoughtful and special as I am. Along those lines, I call your attention to Gatorade and its oft-stated self-identification as restorative manna for elite athletes.

I recently attempted to make a citizen's arrest for crimes against humanity. The event that gave rise to this bold act of community self-policing occurred at a birthday party for one of the three-year-olds in my kid's class. For some reason, the host decided to give out the goodie bags well in advance of the party's end. For some reason, she decided to include whistles in said goodie bags.

Sometimes a little and barely-funny concept works simply by virtue of being non-offensive and relentless. Aflac's lightly comic duck is ready for a digital upgrade.