Apotheke. Immediately, because it's described as an unmarked door in Chinatown, I think, "Great, I'm going to get kicked out for having my camera," with flashbacks to the Thrillist Yuletide Party at The Eldridge. Fleeting worries of more pickpocketing and BlackBerry pilfering skirted through the chasms of my mind, which I had to push away in favor of more positive thinking. This is no way to arrive at a party - with a brain bucket full of sewage and BPAs. Want to know how it went? Am I sitting here on Wednesday morning filing more fraud and forgery affidavits and …

Last night was like a scene from The Peach Pit After Dark, but without Dylan, Brandon, and Brenda. I was wrapped in a portfolio of expensive shoes and hair and dropped into a '90s timewarp, where MTV played music videos, Kelly Taylor made it OK to get a nose job, and Heather Locklear's Amanda (the OG of Melrose Place) thumbed her nose at respectable corporate attire. I bring you the premiere party for "The Broadroom," written by Ms. Candace Bushnell, produced by Meredith Corporation in association with Co.Op TV, and starring Jennie Garth, Jennifer Esposito, Talia Balsam, Broadway actress Mary …

If Advertising Week had a smell, what would it be? If this were the era of "Mad Men," maybe it would smell like gimlets and cigarettes. During disco days, it might smell like gold lamé and roller-skate wheels. In the '80s the olfactory experience would be sprayed with Aquanet and cocaine nosebleeds. For the life of me I can't recall stand out pop culture vices, maybe crimped hair and double stacked socks? And now, here we are, still wrapped in the '00 slice of 2000 and we may have too many scents to choose from.

Last night, Uptown brought it midtown and soon, I'm going to have to take someone downtown. I have no idea why, but when I'm headed for Saks Fifth Avenue, I always stand on 6th and 50th, stomp one heeled foot down with exasperation and with a befuddled air wonder "Where the hell is this place?" Fifth Avenue, Kelly. Fifth. Every time. Anyway, I entered the building, welcomed the full assault of decadent fragrances and headed to the Café at SFA with Rebecca Reyes, IBM web editor extraordinaire. The doors opened to the shoe floor and jazz grabbed our earlobes and …

You're sitting in a lounge in White Plains, NY with an old friend because White Plains is the perfect halfway point. There's a little karaoke, there's a couple weirdos, there are a lot of laughs. You reach into your bag to grab your wallet. It's not there. The rest of the night is one hit after another as one officer from the White Plains PD scolds you for leaving your valuables out for the taking with the nonsensical analogy of "I wouldn't just put my gun on the bar and walk away!!" As you snap back "my wallet won't kill …