• by Erik Sass , Staff Writer @eriksass1, September 13, 2013

We’ve all seen the whimsical, often ridiculous titles people dream up to describe someone who specializes in social media marketing: there are social media gurus, social media rock stars, social media evangelists, social media mavens -- even social media ninjas and social media warriors, fer crying out loud.

I don’t necessarily have a problem with these whimsical titles: if you feel your company stands to benefit from the services of someone who describes themselves, in all seriousness, as a “ninja” on their business card, then go with God and may fortune smile upon you. But I do think we could use a greater range and variety of titles, especially now that there are so many social media specialties and sub-specialties.

For example, what do you call someone whose job it is to jump on Twitter as soon as a corporate scandal breaks in order to track negative sentiment and coordinate a response? I guess you could call them a “social media crisis manager,” but I prefer to think of them as a “social media wet/dry vac” because they help clean up after a big mess.

On that note, here are a few more ideas for new social media titles. I leave it up to you, dear readers, to imagine what duties -- if any -- they might involve. Why, if it sounds appealing you might even want to consider becoming a Social Media…

Comptroller

Alewife

Forester

Beekeeper

Falconer

Tipstaff

Stable Boy

Charwoman

Cheese Monger

Chimney Sweep

Ostler

Bath Attendant

Lockkeeper

Stevedore

Loblolly Boy

Phrenologist

Muleskinner

Pettifogger

Tollbooth Attendant

Feel free to suggest your own titles in the comments section!