• by Kelly Samardak , December 10, 2008

The 28th Annual Muse Awards, The Waldorf Astoria, New York
December 9, 2008

What a day today (well, yesterday, as you're reading this tomorrow. wooeeeooo, freaky!) at The Wally. Oh, The Wally? That's what I call the Waldorf Astoria because I'm such a regular there. Me and the "skybox" section, as I like to call it, are very close. Last time I watched as Brian Williams tried to take us all in his media denial time machine and head back to when stone tablets were king and today, well today, I got to sip champagne with the brightest in New York Women in Film and Television, sharing odd chicken salad with the likes of Laura Linney, Cynthia Nixon, Michael Musto, and that girl from the show... with the dog. You know what I mean.

I'm in New York. I like television. I'm a woman. I would cry if I couldn't watch Pat Kiernan on NY1. And what would my parents do if they couldn't entertain themselves with Aflac duck impressions and jingle singing? Mind you, I said entertain themselves. I wouldn't be half as sane if I wasn't able to enjoy the "Real Housewives of New York City" while bouncing rent checks (how else would I know to avoid places like the Hawaiian Tropic Zone?), or "Single In The City" (which I loved and I think is the granddaddy of these Real Housewives reality shows, so there) when I was single and realized, regardless of income bracket, there's a jackass out there for everyone, or movies that make you cringe in your seat with uncomfortable honesty. Seriously, the escape, the popcorn, the sticky floors, the partial nudity -- now imagine those things... without women. Borrrrring. Precisely why the New York Women in Film & Television (NYWIFT) hold their annual (this being the 28th annual) Muse Awards for Outstanding Vision and Achievement.

Before we all basked in the glow of that monster-truck-sized chandelier in the grand ballroom, women and "the smattering of gay male friends you brought with you," later snarked Nancy Giles, filled the small cocktail reception area sipping on what looked like mango mimosas, champagne, wine (red before noon freaks me out), and various other sparkly quaffables. I can't really name anyone, you'll just have to zoom in on nametags in the flickr set. But what I will say is, the appropriate and non-wildebeest way to decline a photo is to say "oh, no thank you," not completely turn your back and disregard my polite question of "Do you mind if I take a photo?" I quietly concocted a plan that included leaping from the staircase, dangling from the chandelier, and then releasing my flying squirrel wrestling drop. Instead I walked away.

Inside the ballroom was a sea of chicken salads and goodie bags waiting for their corporate guests. Upstairs and in the delightful "steerage" area as I like to call it, I found Roy Frumkes, Editor of Films in Review and Meredith, whose last name I didn't get, but she works for Us Weekly on "editorials and some writing." At the table to the right was Paul Sladkus, who couldn't say enough positive things (which made my head simmer) about our view, the state of media, the wonderful women and talent around us, yadda yadda yadda. All that sunshine and happiness fits as he is the fellow behind GoodNewsBroadcast.com. It is what it is. All good news all the time.

Let's get to the ladies. Nancy Giles of "China Beach," "Working Girl," and "CBS Sunday Morning" Essays fame was a warm, funny, I'm-your-friend-talking-to-you-and-only-you" master of ceremonies. Thumping applause met her announcement that Ann Coulter's jaw is still wired shut, tooth-sucking "oooo"s met her short dig at Sarah Palin, and her retelling of her experience with being mistaken for a transvestite in her "Working Girl" days zinged with wit when she declared, "Anyone who KNOWS transvestites knows THEY know how to wear high heels"-- insinuating that she hadn't quite mastered the craft.

Spanx should listen up because they got a nod not only from Nancy Giles, but also from Cyma Zarghami, President Nickelodeon and MTVN Kids, as she received her award, stating "I'm wearing Spanx, my feet are killing me, and I love 'Sex and The City.'" Speaking of... Cynthia Nixon was also honored with the Muse and she gave a sweet speech that covered her history with Linda Kaplan Thaler (my new hero, either through the power of large screen life-montages in the Waldorf Astoria or just because she doesn't seem to suck at being a human), CEO and Chief Creative Officer, Kaplan Thaler Group, her obvious disgust with the Republican party for bashing "community builders," to a little eco-friendly ditty -- which Nixon sang -- that she learned from Kaplan Thaler back in the day when Kaplan Thaler taught her piano.

I shouldn't be surprised that all of these powerful women knew each other in past lives before stardom on the screen, but man, it's still really blatant that to reach THAT level, you literally have to know/babysit/give birth to the right person out of millions. While popping up to take photos that washed out any facial features from so far way, I noted Michael Musto, Village Voice columnist, at the table next to me. He was seated with that girl from "Single in The City" -- you know the one -- she had a dog and wouldn't date anyone who didn't like her dog. Come on! Jill Zarin from The Real Housewives of New York City was there as well, checking her phone or updating her Facebook status.

I think the food was good. I took pictures of if, but didn't eat it. Judging by the way the woman (not Musto ) behind me chewed it with such open-mouthed smacking gusto, it must have been noteworthy as all-get-out.

Invite kelly@mediapost.com to your fancy pants party and get in Just An Online Minute!

See what we chewed on in the Flickr photo set!