• by Hayley Clark-braverman , May 20, 2026

They’re remixing memes, showing up at movie premieres, and making strangers laugh in comment sections. Together, they’re creating what the curated era rarely delivered: a sense of belonging.

For the past decade, participating online meant performing. It was big, loud and exhausting. Every post proved you were living your best life: the latte art, the Bali sunset, the #girlboss. Coming out of the recession, we sought control by trying to become our “best” selves. Who wasn’t devoted to their Fitbit or pressured into a side hustle? The platforms rewarded it. So, we shared everything. Yet somehow, we’re lonelier for it. 

And then we needed to stop.

Today, participation looks different: smaller, quieter and more experimental. The internet is one big open-mic night, where everything is raw material for remixing. Participation means “yes, anding” the internet: the first rule of improv and increasingly, of connection.

It’s showing up everywhere. Strava’s clubs (e.g. running, hiking, cycling) nearly quadrupled in 2025. Warner Brothers says fan edits outperform traditional trailers 3:1. The 365 buttons meme started in the comment section. These are the new playgrounds, and play is still how we make friends.

We got here because what followed the pandemic has been relentless uncertainty, anxiety and pressure. Something had to give.

So we turned to each other. The Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the longest-running studies on happiness, has consistently found that strong relationships are the most important factor in long-term health and happiness. Why? Relationships regulate stress. Not achievement. Not status. Relationships.

That’s why we shifted from “look at me” to “let’s play.” Brands now have a choice: keep broadcasting or learn to play. 

Play builds relationships now, and relationships drive loyalty -- not a program, not a discount, but a feeling. Antavo says 74% of loyalty members stop engaging after two months. Points get them in, but won’t keep them there. Here’s how to win.

"Yes, and" your audience: Every comment, reaction and fan-made piece of content is a gift. Give them raw assets to play with and step back. Crocs fans love the shoe, but love being invited together more. That’s co-creation, loyalty’s most underutilized lever.

Make your partner look good: The best players make everyone shine. For brands, that means finding the micro communities and rituals customers already love and servicing them. Nike Run Club exists to make runners look good, not Nike.

Know when to leave the stage: Nothing appears more out of touch than trying too hard to be in touch with culture. Don’t jump into every scene and kill the vibe. Brands with real loyalty know when to show up and when to get out of the way.

Here’s the hard truth: Every brand is talking about community or belonging, words so overused they’ve lost meaning. But most brands are too uncomfortable to build a community, because that would require giving up their cherished asset: control. That’s the ask: trust that if you freely give people something worth playing with, it will come back as loyalty.

The brands that win won’t go viral. They’ll learn to play.