For years, the Cannes Festival was a money machine because nobody ever went broke catering to the vanity and hedonism of the advertising industry. Now it is a money juggernaut, because it has found a marketplace even more lucrative than vanity.

I've been working on a book about the dawning Relationship Era -- in which brands must find human connections between themselves and stakeholders, as opposed to purchasing attention in order to persuade strangers to buy something.

This is a cry for help. There is something I just nearly did, just moments ago -- something weak and common. Somehow I managed to veer away at the last instant, but I don't know how much longer I can resist. Is there some sort of sponsor I can call? Someone I can turn to when, at long last, I can no longer summon the inner strength? My name is Bob, and I just nearly clicked on: Snooki's Cellphone Hacked, Nude Pictures Hit the Web [REPORT] 12.

Never mind Hollywood and New York. If you're looking to keep the TV industry alive, maybe you should think about Emerald City. Perhaps you recall Dorothy, small and meek. She schlepped around Oz for two and a half hours with three freaks and a Cairn terrier trying to find the wizardry to get her back to Kansas. They dodged flying monkeys, spent a night doing mad opiates, and brutally melted Cora, the Maxwell House lady -- not realizing that Dorothy had the power to get home all along. All she had to do was click her heels three times and …