There were a lot of amusing answers to this one. But what I never got around to is my other question which is: Why would anybody want to be an "expert"?
To me saying you're an expert seems to suggest you're trying to dust off past experience as something permanent and established. Pretty much everything we deal with, but especially social media, is in a space where it's better to be the student than the professor. That experimentation and ignorance is a powerful tool that shouldn't be traded away for labels like "expert."
What say you all?