Commentary

#FreeMelania

I am not a psychologist, although I claim to my kids that a lifetime of experience gives me insights that ought to be at least considered (if not accepted without question!) But you need not have any smarts at all to see that Melania hates her husband as much as most of the country does -- and probably for all of the same reasons (and many closed-door ones that we can only speculate about).

Only a woman with an ironclad prenup that would cost her dearly stays with a man who brags about how easily and frequently he grabs other women by the crotch, or walks in on undressed beauty pageant contestants who feel powerless to protest. And who tends to treat her in particular like an afterthought, even though the whole world is watching.

I have no real empathy for Melania, since she used her model good looks to appeal to a man who is clearly a narcissistic  psychopath, but who has what appears to be a nice balance sheet. I'm sure she didn't get what she bargained for. Certainly she never expected to be the First Lady.

Most in her place have spent years participating in the political process with their candidate husbands (or themselves), and have a clue what is expected and acceptable. She had none of that experience.  She did what little was asked of her in the campaign, probably thinking like the rest of us, "This will drive itself off a cliff." I expect at NO time did she imagine that she would be the wife of the most powerful man in the world -- and all the 24/7 scrutiny that comes with it.

You could tell by the shocked, beyond-the-void expression on her face when she appeared on TV during the campaign, post-election and especially during the inauguration festivities that she was thinking (in Slovene), "What in the HELL have I gotten myself into?"

It's one thing to be a fashion model or get married in a $200,000 dress or even be the umpteenth wife of The Donald, but being measured in the press nearly every day for every little flip of the hand is a whole new ballgame.

I suspect that Melania has lived in a fairly controlled environment serving at the behest of Himself, with little opportunity to develop or express her own opinions about matters that now threaten to drown her family. One gets the impression her marching orders consist pretty much of "Shut up and stay away out of the public spotlight." And that pisses her off.

Not only does she have to occasionally see The Donald nude, but she has to agree with him and stroke his massive ego. That has to be simply wretched (as wretched as life can be in the penthouse of Trump Tower) if you are trying to self-actualize as an adult American woman.

Vanity Fair wrote in an April story: "Traditionally, presidents have at least made a show of having healthy, happy marriages. Even the Clintons, despite marital troubles, appeared to have moments of genuine affection, humor, and bonding. But from almost the first moments of Inauguration Day, during the ceremonial arrival at the White House, it seemed something was amiss with the Trumps.... Despite assurances from her spokesperson, Stephanie Grisham, that Melania is embracing the role of First Lady, most signs point to a distinct lack of interest."

Someone close to Trump this week told CNN: "Trump is not loyal, except to his family. He can be solicitous and ingratiating. But if there's a moment you are not useful, forget it, you're done. No matter what you have done for him." Consider: Rudy Giuliani, Paul Manafort, Chris Christie.

Trump's first marriage lasted 15 years; the second, six. Melania is on borrowed time. How long before she hits that list?

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