• by John Capone , January 31, 2008

You can lead a mag to water, but you can’t make it drink. Parade has brought on a new top editor. And they went straight to the well, poaching Janice Kaplan from TV Guide. A logical choice, considering the pub’s audience is probably comprised of the (few) people who still have TV Guide subscriptions. The magazine is now perfect for those who thought Parade was a bit too wordy and esoteric before. The new Ed’s first issue features the cover story, “What Made My Year Special” By President George W. Bush, which quite possibly may have been ghost written by a third grader who thought it was a book report (meeting “the bun lady” was a highlight).

The dubious claim that Parade is “America’s Most Widely Read Magazine” in a banner across the cover comes courtesy of the independent research firm MRI. The gurus at MRI could not divulge the complicated jujitsu algorithms they use to turn a circ of 32 million into an audience of 70.4 million. Too bad your ad budget doesn’t double itself like that.