• by Jack Loechner , Staff Writer @mp_research, August 27, 2009

According to a recent Common Sense Media survey, fielded by The Benenson Strategy Group, to examine how social networks are affecting kids and families, parents have a lot to learn when it comes to their children's behaviors online, writes Marketing Charts in summary. 49% of parents say their child was age 13 or older before starting unsupervised surfing, but just 14% of teens say they actually waited this long.

The results of the poll illustrate a continuing disconnect between parents and kids when it comes to kids' digital lives. The survey of both teens and parents found that many teens use the internet as a forum for gossip, sharing and blowing off steam, but others, unbeknownst to their parents, are also engaging in bullying and risqué behavior online.

Parents have yet to realize how much time teens spend on social networking sites. 4% say their children check social networking sites more than 10 times a day, but 22% of teens do. 23% of parents say their children log in more than once a day, but 51% do. And, not all parents even know that their teens are using Facebook or MySpace, while 12% of teens with Facebook or MySpace pages admit their parents don't know about the account.

In A Question Posed to Parents:
Have you/your child ever done this online?	% of Teens Actual	% of Parents Perception
Complain about or make fun of your teachers	54%	29%
Post something you later regretted	39	20
Make fun of other students	37	18
Share personal information about yourself that you would not normally share in public	28	16
Send or post sexual jokes that you would not normally say out loud	24	14
Create a profile for yourself with a different or false identity	25	12
Pretend to be someone else online	26	10
Download or share files illegally	23	10
Pretend to be an adult while chatting with someone online	18	8
Post false information or lies about other people	16	4
Sign onto someone else's social networking account or profile using their password, without them knowing.	24	4
Send or post naked or semi-naked photos or videos of yourself or others online	13	2
Source: Common Sense Media, August 2009

But, says the report, many teens are victims :

·      18% of teens say someone has posted a humiliating picture of them, or humiliated them online. Of these people, 23% "got revenge doing something similar to them."

·      19% of teens say they have been harassed online or "cyberbullied" and 38% know someone else who has been.

Significant numbers of teens are also engaging in some rather risqué behavior online. Many have yet to learn that once you post something online, it's out there for life:

Online Teen Behavior
Online Activity	% Teens saying they have done online
Post something you later regretted	39%
Share personal information about yourself that you would not normally share in public	28
Send or post pictures of others that you're not sure they would want shared	24
Send or post naked or semi-naked photos or videos of yourself or others online	13
Source: Common Sense Media, August 2009

Social networking sites have become a major part of teens' daily interactions, with over half of all teens checking the sites more than once a day and almost a quarter checking more than 10 times a day.

Frequency of Teens Visiting Websites (% of Teens Responding)
Online Activity	More than Once Daily	More than 10 times a Day
Social Networking Sites	51%	22%
Sites with streaming TV or video	33	13
Online gaming sites	30	12
Websites that host teen chat rooms	14	6
Websites for homework or report help	7	3
Sports websites	7	2
Source: Common Sense Media, 2009

Finally, Common Sense Media concludes with this call to understanding and action:

·      Social networks and mobile communication connect our kids to their friends 24/7. But there are differences between face-to-face communication and digital communication. It's important to understand how the nature of technology is changing the nature of how our kids learn to communicate.

·      On the positive side, social networks are a relatively safe space for kids to try on different hats and figure out not only who they are but also who they want to be. But when teens communicate either anonymously or through a disguised identity, the doors are left wide open for them not to be held accountable. It also leads to a real disconnect between action and consequence, which is how irresponsible behaviors like cyberbullying become a reality.

·      The call to action is clear: Parents are the first line of defense when it comes to helping kids use the same senses of responsibility and self-respect whether they're online or off.

James Steyer, CEO of Common Sense Media says that "... communication and socialization in our kids' world is increasingly moving from face-to-face to face-to-cyberspace... in a digital world, parents need to play a more important role than ever in ensuring that kids get the best of these technologies and are using them safely."