Commentary

Insights from 'Extreme Ownership': Ego Vs. Pride

Guess what causes most of the problems in the world?  It’s actually quite simple: ego.

I just finished a great book called “Extreme Ownership” by two ex-Navy Seals: Jocko Willink and Leif Babin.  The book was amazing because it pointed out how ego manifests in the workplace by using examples these two had seen in the field as Seals, but also as business consultants in the workplace.  

The book basically states that when you interact with your boss, your team, or your colleagues, you should always accept ownership for when things are going poorly in much the same way as you would if they are going well.  To do that, you have to be willing to say, “I was wrong” and listen to the opposing point of view.  Once you listen to them and truly hear what they are saying, then you’re set up to resolve the situation in a way that works for everyone.

What I like about this concept is there’s actually a difference between taking responsibility vs. ownership of a challenge.  Responsibility is like just saying “sorry,” while ownership goes far beyond an apology and gets to the root of the challenge in a productive way.  Ownership means you are willing to learn from the situation and fix it, but also set yourself up to understand what you can do to be better in the future.

advertisement

advertisement

What stops many of us from owning a situation that’s going poorly is ego.  In some cases our egos are what drive us, but ego and ambition should not be confused for one another.  Ego is a defense mechanism that can stop you from seeing the real solution because no ego likes to be bruised.  Pride is sometimes confused with ego, but you can have a lot of pride in what you do without being too egotistical.  Pride is different from arrogance, while ego is a close cousin to it.

Our business has grown so much in the last 10 years that it has adopted a swagger all its own, and many of the people in the business have adopted that same swagger.  While I love this business, I don’t love the swagger.  Humility is a valuable characteristic and one that sets you up for continued success.  You should never be so arrogant as to think you cannot improve further.  

Our industry still has a lot of room for improvement, so while it’s OK for us to have some pride, let’s make sure to balance it with some humility for the way we operate going forward. For all the talk of unicorns in the tech industry, there are 300 busted ideas — and that should never be overlooked.

I bring this up only because some of the best examples of successful people whom I’ve seen in the last 10 years are people with a strong balance of pride and humility, and I think our business could use more of that balance.

Lately I've attended conferences and read articles where there were people who take an elitist approach to viewing our business. I find that approach dangerous.  It’s also condescending and something of a turn-off.  These are not the kind of people I would want to represent us — and I’m sure these are not the kind of people our customers want to work with.

I can’t stop everyone in the business from acting in that elitist, arrogant way. But by pointing this out, I hope to stop some of us from doing just that.

1 comment about "Insights from 'Extreme Ownership': Ego Vs. Pride".
Check to receive email when comments are posted.
  1. Steve Baldwin from Didit, April 6, 2016 at 2:01 p.m.

    Cory -- I'm confused by your last two grafs ("I've attended conferences and read articles whre there were people who take an elitist approach to viewing our business..."). Are you talking about people from outside AdTech (i.e. "real advertising people") who view our field as a bunch of socially challenged spammer/geeks, or about our own people -- who view our bunch as tech-enabled, super-smart marketing overlords? Forgive me if I'm being opaque, but it's not clear (at least to me) who you are referring to and why exactly this is so dangerous.

Next story loading loading..