• by Kelly Samardak , November 4, 2008

Moss Networks Ad:Tech VIP Mix & Mingle, Jay Z's 40/40 Club, New York
November 3, 2008

Another typical Monday night in Manhattan; getting yelled at by that guy on the corner of 22nd and Broadway, narrowly missing an unidentified object on the sidewalk, and a "VIP Mix & Mingle" at Jay Z's 40/40 Club. I couldn't sift out who was actually throwing this multi-sponsored party in a cave, but I like the unknown. When things are unfamiliar, that means for once (and it's been awhile) the human scenery might actually be different.

There was something a little wackadoodle about this party. I still can't put my finger on it. Maybe it was the windowless, granny's-basement -feel of the "VIP Room." Maybe it was the way that the bouncer and the list woman at the door barked things at each other like "I've got these four" like Beyonce herself was giving away the best ad:tech pen in town. Either way, it was a little off. Take that with a grain of kosher salt because I'm a little off myself.

I stepped into the purple-from-the-Moss-Networks-projected-signs room and instantly looked for black mold. That's the bad stuff, right? The kind that creeps in and can kill your family? I'm telling you, the room felt like a basement, or a fallout shelter. So if anything, we were safe from tornados and possible nuclear holocaust. I walked around and, before I could acclimate myself, a shiny purple thing skipped up to me with a huge glistening smile, crammed her card into my hand with a good firm shake and said "I'm Bonnie Moss, founder of Moss Networks! Let me know if there is anything AT ALL that you need!" and she meant it. After getting the scoop on me and doing the infamous MediaPost/mediabistro name flip-around (which also let me know that Joe Ciarallo must be lurking!), she flittered off in an assertive wave of wild lavender. I'll have what she's having.

What's that smell? Ah yes, the harbinger of media parties leapt into view, trailing wafts of burger breath behind them. That steaming hot tray of mini-burgers stole the scene. I didn't eat one, shocking Matt Biscuiti of Lippen Group. He has witnessed the power with which I can slam those puppies in, which is also why I've started eating a huge plate of veggies before I hit these parties now. Bloats you up really nice and says "no vacancy!" to those fattening little jerks and their merry band of cocktail wieners/chicken on a sticks/fried cheese and other artery-clogging punks. Biscuiti was hanging out in another private room off of the already private basement with Kory Kredit, VP Marketing, PV Media Group (AdOn Network, one of the party sponsors, falls under their team), and Joe Ciarallo, Horn Grouper by day, PRNewser by... day. Kredit had a mini-burger.

I left those guys to talk PR pitches and ran into two very bizarre creatures. One professed to be a model and addressed me as "sweetheart" while he wobbled back and forth with his tie loosened and hanging limply over his unbuttoned shirt. I need to look more sinister so people realize this is a job and I am working, not looking to be taken home. I shut him out and asked his pal, a sweater-clad, messenger-bag-slinging fellow ,what his story was. You know, "were you at ad:tech all day..." to which he responded, "What do I do? Well, I sell people things they don't want. I prey on their insecurities by making them feel bad for themselves to get them to buy what I've got." Maybe he's behind all those "you're fat, hairy, and your boyfriend is frigid" Facebook ads. You're right, he could have been lying, but what's odder... being that brutally honest about your job, or crashing a "VIP" ad:tech party? I'm just saying.

I headed back to see if Joe Ciarallo wanted to run over to the EPIC Advertising party at Marquee, but not before I snapped the GenieKnows.com private booth of Mark Harper, Mausam Kalra, Corey Loye, JT Manning, Jodi Manning, John Manning, and Barbara Manning. Alright, off to the next party!

As Joe and I walked in one of the last mild nights in NYC to Marquee we ran through every party we've been to -- from his experience at the Radar party (which he said was a really great time); to self-important clipboard captains ("you're killing me!!" was a phrase uttered to guests at one point); to snarling bouncers; to the infamous PR Term "VIP." "I know, I totally fell for it!" Joe hooted. "Joe," I reasoned, "You should be able to smell your own kind."

Tomorrow, unless I decide that election party write-ups are more timely (they will be), I'll let you in on the grindfest that was the EPIC Advertising Party.

Invite kelly@mediapost.com to your swell shindig and get covered in Just An Online Minute!

Who else was there?  Check the Flickr pictures!

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