Commentary

Just An Online Minute... Amanda Lepore Brings Out The Big Guns At Perez Hilton's Blogads Party

Perez Hilton + Blogads Party, Greenhouse, New York
December 2, 2009

Last night the company I kept included a magician, a baby-faced DJ, silver-masked spandexed sprites, men in bright pink lipstick, a transsexual New York City icon, the original gangsta (you know, the OG) of celebrity gossip, grass, advertypes, a smoking hot rapper from Chi-town, marketing types, music types, and the most confusing waitress ever.  Before I discovered pictures of myself and my +1 wrapped in boas and facially adorned with Dr. Peepers' oversized glasses this morning, I thought maybe it had been a disco fries-induced dream...but it wasn't.

Last night the Blogads team and Perez Hilton threw quite possibly the perfect storm of a party at Greenhouse.  Greenhouse is my dream house.  Everything is small and sparkly - but in heaping helpings.  The ceiling is covered in dangling drops of reflective balls (Glass? Crystal? Who care - it sparkles) and the lighting schemes were soft and hot pink with a dash of clouded ice blue.   My Ohio family's sod farm would make a killing in Greenhouse, with its individual coffee tables matted with squares of grass.  And you know what they say: Where there's grass, there's Prosecco.  The bubbling liquid crack was served in tall sexy cylinders where the bubbles shoved each other past the plump red cherry lazing at the bottom of the chic tumbler.  I glanced around the room and saw a familiar face.

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As I began talking with an adver-guy from Osmosis, Kevin the magician appeared in a cloud of smoke (not really).  Magicians freak me out.  No matter how steely I stare at their hands, I still can't figure it out.  This magician was no different, assailing us first with card tricks, once even barfing up my card, which I KNEW was not in his mouth.  He then roped my date for the evening, Nithya Rajendran, Marketing Director, UG Strategies, and Blogad's Nicole Bogas, into the "hey, the rings are separated and now they're together" trick.  He then wiggled a fork into a Beetlejuice-esque prong spray that blew our minds.  Nithya was going to keep it, but I scared her with my "while you sleep it's going to come to life..." warnings.  Strangely, way on the other side of the room, we saw it again, as if it had followed us...

What the nerd was 360i's David Berkowitz doing at a Perez Hilton party?!  He must have been asking himself the same thing because after mingling with Blogad founder and CEO, Henry Copeland, Gather's VP of Sales Scott Perry, and even getting a picture with Perez Hilton, David high-tailed it outta there just before a big glossy pair of red lips parted the entryway curtains.  Those lips and the porcelain skin they lounged on belonged to Amanda Lepore who, if you're in the NYC, you may have encountered in your East Village travels.  She is not one to go unnoticed.  Amanda Lepore is glittery sequined nightlife, a transsexual icon who was slated to entertain us with burlesque around 8:30 p.m. 

Joining Amanda Lepore was Cazwell and a cast of characters in an eternal contest of color.  All had perfected the photo pose of "irritable."  These are people that poke Technicolor holes in our sometimes grayscale lives.   I know Thanksgiving is over and all, but I am thankful for their creativity and courage and camp.  "I don't know much about fashion, but my hair! Is! Fierce!" sang Lepore in her bored-Valley-girl-on-Quaaludes tone.  She lurched with grace in her patent leather heels back and forth across the stage, her mesh-gloved hands swooping and cutting through the air, her platinum blond hair shellacked in place, yet somehow appearing soft.  Then she ditched her dress, freeing black sequined tassles, perching like party hats on Lepore's extra-large melons, which were as remarkably stable as her platinum waved coif.  The removal of her dress also revealed what can only be described as a onesie designed by Spider-Man.

My eyes and brain were still doing the rumba from Lepore's full-court optical press as I waited for Kid Sister to hit the stage.  Preceding Kid Sister were two sinewy, black-spandexed creatures, gesticulating and jerking, contorting their bodies impossibly (note to self: stretch, hit treadmill).  Was that crumping? Was that... well what was that?  And who cares - it was AWESOME.   Their faces were half masked a la disco Phantom of the Opera in silver, which exacerbated my dream sequence. 

I think you can feel Kid Sister (her parents call her Melissa Young) smiling before you see her.   She oozes contagious warm energy and owned the room after what you'd think would be a hard act to follow.   The dancing, the music, her positive vibe - I want it in pill form.  No, I was not just trying to procure street vitamins, thank you.  Mid-set, Kid Sister leapt off the stage and danced out into the audience, pausing for a short grind with Perez Hilton, and weaving into the middle of Greenhouse, where I spotted the wide-eyed Walt Ribiero, founder of ForOrchestra.com (he'll arrange your favorite tunes... for orchestra!).

Persia Tatar, Founder of Social Media Society and lover of pizza; Jarrett Huddleston, President, POMCO Industries; Giovanni Gianni, "gionotgeo" on MySpace (you know, that other social network); musician Charlotte Sometimes; Jeffrey Mann, Music Devourer, Pop Culture Sponge, Foodie and Oenophile, Creative Muse, Digital and Mobile Maniac, Art and Film Enthusiast, Lover of the International (ripped from his Twitter bio!); Blogads' Katie Brauer; Reindeer's Erika Panasci; and John Macchia, Artist Relations, Universal Motown -- all made it out to Greenhouse, which was filled, but never uncomfortably packed, which also tickled my party bone.

Dream-world fun, definitely up there in the top ten to beat.   The only meh moment was that it seems Greenhouse hired Beelzebub's hormonally raging daughter as one of their servers.  She yanked away her tray and stalked off as Nithya reached for a cocktail wiener and then blatantly avoided us after that.  I was so confused and my rudeness tolerance meter broke as I chased her down for a puff pastry and a stink-eye. So so strange.  But not a night-ruiner.

Tonight I'm headed to the Agencies in Action holiday party celebrating the ad community's volunteerism. I think it's at the TBWA offices.  Should probably figure that out now!

Party pics are up! A handful are NSFW-ish.

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