• by Kelly Samardak , January 21, 2009

Yelp Inauguration Ball, Country, New York
January 20, 2009

When you think of our 44th president's inauguration, what image flashes into your mind?  Is it Aretha Franklin's hat?  Perhaps it's Michelle Obama's teal shoes?  Could it be the chilly millions covering every inch of DC?  Want to know what jolts across my grey blob in a sequined cup of democracy?  Spinning tassles.  Sometimes the right, sometimes the left, and sometimes... left and right at the same time.

After an hour of shooting networking agency types at the OMMA Agency of the Year awards, I ran out again into the angrily biting cold and made my way to Country for the "elite" portion of the ball held an hour before the actual start.  My first interaction was only slightly annoying - Captain Clipboard scolded me for holding the door open while people trickled out.  It would have been awkward not to let them leave, no? 

Regardless, I made it through with my +1, dropped my coat and two stupid bags at coat check, got my picture taken with cardboard Obama, grabbed a Richard Nixon (dirty martini, very appropriate) and began my hunt for munchies. It was easy to weave through the crowd without doing the always comfy accidental buns rub, but a line had already sprung up around the cheese and pepperoni slices table.  The Yelpers in line looked inaugified as DJs Andrew and Andrew began a full musical assault with their weapons of choice: songs with the word "change" in them.  Even though I was about to be just one face in a little over 2000 skin carriers, seeing satin gowns, striped suits, and sharp ties made me feel like I was part of an earth-thumping celebration.

A hand flattened under a tray of mini burgers stalked through the crowd, denying the grabby guests on the first floor their tiny beef buddies.  I got my hands on one later and almost honked it up in my hand.  If I were to write a Yelp review, I would say it was cold and dry and tasted like onion sweat.  The tiny circles of beef tenderloin wrapped around creamy goat cheese made up for it.  You could slap goat cheese on roadkill and I would be first at that table.

Around 8 p.m. the floodgates opened and by fives and 10s of skinny little Manhattanites and their spiffed-up dudes piled in, making a beeline for the bar, where vodka was free thanks to Saaga Vodka.  I never found the Manicure Room because I spent the final piece of my evening obsessed with The Sugar Shack Burlesque Dancers: sassy things sequined and spinning in red, white, and blue.  My favorite was "Apollo Creed," who began her routine in boxing gloves and shredded trunks, her red lips glistening in teasing twist.  Of course she had a sequined top on initially, but that came off, revealing sparkling tassels that constantly moved to the winds of change, I'm sure.  It takes an incredibly talented gal to make those tassels spin in opposite directions all at once.

It was pure comedy watching the guests watching the burlesque dancers.  Guys tried to hide their curiosity about the tiny streamer skirt of "blue state girl" from their cocktail-dressed gals, while the woman next to me just went for it, spanking Apollo Creed on the tuchus with her clutch.

With my liver processing my Richard Nixon, I finally ran into Keri Moran Schundler, Account Executive at Yelp, who was balancing a clear beverage in one hand, a clipboard in another hand, and a pen in the other hand.  Wait... what?  She was helping Yelpers with nametags.  In true Yelp style, mine read "Kelly S." 

Who else was there?  Hermann Mazard, owner of Homeshopr; Nater Kane and Oz Sultan of wearenom.com; Brett Petersel of Mashable; Jamel Oeser-Sweat an Attorney; Alexis Douglas a Staff Assistant with the NBA; Erik Mayor, CEO/Founder of LatinLime Marketing Group, LLC; Jonathan Wegener, Yelpers Jamec O., Lucy L., Tak B., Armin L., Samantha S., and a slew of others celebrated the presidential inauguration.  And finally, as I was about to hit the coat check line, I ran into Chantelle Karl, PR super-vixen at Yelp.

The night was only marred at the end while I waited for coat check, crammed in between jostling and yodeling drunk partygoers.  A herd of multiple ticket-holders clogged the front, causing my chunk of the line to lag in front of the constantly opening door -- sneaking in puff after skin-ripping puff of iceman air.  I nearly choked everyone in line.  I almost left my coat and bags there.  But I counted to 92 and breathed.

I can't end this negatively; the night was too fun.  Not just fun, but philanthropic as well!  Yelpers raised enough donations for over 15,000+ hot meals to be served at St John's Bread and Life. Also, pulling together the DJs, the burlesque, and a venue that never gave me a claustrophobic rage outbreak had to be a labor of, um, love for Jane Kwett, New York Yelp Community Manager, and she did a tremendous job.

You don't have to have burlesque to get in Just An Online Minute - but helps. send invitations to kelly@mediapost!

There are a ridiculous amount of pictures on Flickrso you don't miss a thing.

If my BlackBerry screen wasn't cracked, rendering it useless, I would have tweeted the entire event.