WHAT STINKS -- Something doesn't smell right about the timing of Greg Stuart's departure from the Interactive Advertising Bureau. Maybe it's "What Sticks," the new book co-written by Stuart and marketing evolutionary Rex Briggs.

TERROR IS A WASTEFUL THING TO MIND -- Great, now we're actually afraid of water. In the span of five years, we've managed to go from a society free to carry just about anything shy of a loaded pistol aboard a major airline to being banned from bottles of Evian.

REMEMBER WHEN PEOPLE WANTED THEIR MTV? Now, it seems, they want their Google. MTV included.

FORBES SELLS STAKE TO INVESTORS INCLUDING BONO -- NEW YORK, Aug 7 (Reuters) - A private equity group that includes Irish rock star Bono bought a stake in family-held publisher Forbes, becoming the first outsider to invest in its business media properties, the companies said on Monday. Three words: Monday, Bloody, Monday.

UP, UP, AND AWAY -- We're feeling a little uppity today, so we have to confess, we stopped counting the number of upfront events a long time ago. We also stopped going to many of them.

A friend recently asked us to help his son with a college project about media. For those who aren't currently enrolled in Media 101, here are his questions and our answers to them.

MANIFESTING DESTINIES -- Do you remember the first time you met David Verklin? If you're like us, you probably remember him indelibly as a bright young Turk with boyish good looks, busting at the seams in the media department of Y&R. Thanks no doubt to a portrait stashed in some secret attic, Verklin still has his boyish charm and trademark aura of boundless pluck, but he's now busting at the seams of the entire advertising industry as head of Carat, and, we believe one day, all of Aegis Group or some other bigger organization.

MEDIA MYOPIA -- Television, ironically, has never been especially good at the vision thing. As for its prefix, well, tele is Greek for, "at a distance.

A 'CRASH' COURSE IN MOVIE MARKETING -- We always knew Rishad Tobaccowala was pretty good at forecasting new media trends, but we never realized what a knack the Publicis media guru apparently has for predicting Oscar-winning films. Never known to be rash, Tobaccowala picked "Crash" to win this year's Best Picture, even though it was a Hollywood underdog.

ALL THINGS CONSIDERED, WE'D RATHER BE IN JAMAICA - When the nation's biggest media buyers meet in Orlando this week for their annual conference, the biggest issue on their minds apparently isn't such seemingly important topics as media fragmentation, advertising clutter and increasing consumer control over media content. It's why the broadcast networks aren't showing up for their party.