Commentary

Copywriter Says Meetings Result in 'Completely Mindless Piece of Crap Communication' But This Agency Wants You to Write Like A Chubby Kid in Sweatpants

Well, long-time copywriter Rich Siegel is a man to whom I can relate; a man in whose shoes I have walked and a man I want to meet someday. Why? Because he said this about the insanity of over thinking things; "I was in a meeting about a month ago. Actually, it does me no good to pinpoint the date of this meeting because I was in the same meeting two months ago. Two years ago. 5 years ago. And 10 years ago. You know the kind of meeting. A dozen of the agency's top minds gathered to share their opinions, ply their office politics and grandstand on a do-little, utterly disposable, completely mindless piece of crap communication that will cost $581,327 in research, labor and man hours to produce. And return $27 in actual revenue." Now here's a man who knows exactly what it's like inside an agency. He furthers his point by positing: "Is it any wonder why ad agencies can't make any money these days and demand employees put in 80 hour weeks while chained to the SuperDesk." Not that he, I assume, has anything against The Barbarian Group. But, in fact, his point is simple. The ad industry needs less. Less of everything. less people, less input, less data, less feedback, less tweaking and -- Mother of God -- less PowerPoints! Will we ever see Siegel's world? Of course not! We ad people are a bunch of self-important pricks who love to grandstand and one up our co-workers while pretending to suck their...oh, I'll just stop right there lest I wake the Editor Beast.

Well, as much as Siegel would love things to change, it's unlikely they will. But recruitment ads are certainly becoming more interesting. Check out this one from Utah-based Fusion 360 which, in part, includes requirements such as, "Proficient juggler (or any circus-like skills) encouraged. Digs writing and editing like a chubby kid digs sweat pants. Able to meld even the lamest subjects into all that is awesome and interesting, drawing readers to and through their content like moths to a flame. Stellar dance moves and ‘Top Gun’-style high-fives encouraged, but not required. Ability to be a digital marketing agency ‘rock star,’ less the attitude and that whole snorting coke off Vegas hookers, thing." Really, just about the best-ever help wanted ad we've seen. And the most honest.

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Ad agencies. Pummeled from all sides these days. But if they tread carefully and form the right partnerships, they just might last a few more years. A web video company called Videology has opened up a TV buying and planning division and launched a toolset that helps advertisers (and agencies) better target and implement interactive TV campaigns. Mullen has worked with Videology on behalf of its client JetBlue to target lighter TV viewers on the web while also upping reach to those have seen a JetBlue ad on TV. Of working with Videology, Mullen VP Group Digital Media Director Jade Watts said: “We are able to show our branded work on the big screen, reap the benefits of prime ratings and then are able to find them on a second screen."

Michon Ellis, CEO of Chicago-based multicultural agency LimeGreen, is happy. Very, very happy. The agency just won the Kia Motors account. Of the win, Ellis said, "As the United States market becomes increasingly diverse both ethnically and culturally, as proven by statistics, our agency is in a unique position to help clients such as Kia Motors strengthen their brand's positioning and truly resonate with new audiences." The agency will work both on multicultural marketing programs for the brand as well as help the company improve diversity and inclusion efforts.

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