A NEW NEW M&A MODEL, EH -- It used to be that Madison Avenue just had to worry about the French and the Brits gobbling up plumb U.S. advertising assets, but now the action is heating up north of the border, thanks to an innovative M&A strategy developed by Toronto-based marketing services conglomerate MDC Partners.

DRUMROLE PLEASE - After months of study and an untold sum in consulting fees, Carat today unveiled a new corporate identity. It is: "Carat.

WHO ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT PEOPLE TO KNOW IF YOU'RE A MEDIA PLANNER OR BUYER? - That's what the Riff's colleagues at MEDIA Magazine want to know and they've asked us to ask you if you could take a few minutes to tell them.

STORMY WEATHER THREATENS AGENCY RELATIONS -- The Riff always knew the relationships between marketers and their ad agencies were growing stormy, but now the Association of National Advertisers has canceled its annual Agency Relations Forum due to stormy conditions - the weather kind. The ANA has just alerted the Riff that, due to severe winter storm warnings in the New York metropolitan area, it is postponing the forum, which was scheduled for Wednesday in New York City.

VICE PRESIDENTS - Leave it to the libido-minded editors of Playboy.com to finally answer what's been on all our minds so far this campaign season: How do voters think each of the Presidential aspirants would measure up on the "oval bed.

CAUCUSED OUT - If Monday night's coverage of the Iowa Caucus was a look at what the networks plan for the rest of Election 2004, then they might want to rethink their plans. The pack mentality and spin cycle penetrated the caucus and made it from a laboratory of democracy into, well, a sideshow.

DYSFUNCTIONAL AD BOWL - Maybe it's all those testosterone-charged jocks scrimmaging on the field, but the Super Bowl has always seemed like the ultimate event for manly men. So why would this year's game require not one, but ads from three different marketers of sexual impotence drugs.

WATCH FOR PLAYBOY'S NEXT LEGAL PLAY, MATE - The Internet has essentially destroyed the economic model for printed erotic publications, but now the best-known magazine in that field may be getting even. A federal court says it's okay for Playboy to move forward with a suit it filed in 1999 against Netscape and Excite that claims the search engines' use of generic key words like "playboy" and "playmate" to drive traffic to competing adult entertainment sites was a violation of Playboy's trademarks.

JUST FOR THE RECORD, THE RIFF GETS UP AT 5:45 MOST MORNINGS - "What time do you wake up in the morning and decide how you are going to f--- Mel Karmazin?" That, according to former Viacom shockjock Opie was how current Viacom "muckety-muck" Mel Karmazin called him and radio partner Anthony out on the carpet the time "we almost got fired closer than we almost got fired before." While the radio duo do not disclose the nature of that particular offense in their first "on the record" interview since ultimately being fired for hosting a contest that led to …

BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE LETTERS P & R - As far as media neighborhoods go, Madison Avenue rarely shows up in the same proximity as Sesame Street, but the two may be situated closer than you think. And it's not just because the long-running pre-school series was one of the first public TV shows to be officially sponsored.