• by Jack Loechner , Staff Writer, July 8, 2009

A new Pew Research Center Social & Demographic Trends survey on aging finds a sizable gap between the expectations that young and middle-aged adults have about old age and the actual experiences reported by older Americans themselves.

These disparities come into sharpest focus when survey respondents are asked about a series of negative benchmarks often associated with aging. In every instance, older adults who report experiencing illness, memory loss, an inability to drive, an end to sexual activity, a struggle with loneliness and depression, and difficulty paying bills are experiencing them at lower levels than younger adults expect to encounter them when they grow old.

At the same time, however, older adults report experiencing fewer of the benefits of aging that younger adults expect to enjoy when they grow old, such as spending more time with their family, traveling more for pleasure, having more time for hobbies, doing volunteer work or starting a second career.

These generation gaps in perception also extend to the most basic question of all about old age: When does it begin? Survey respondents ages 18 to 29 believe that the average person becomes old at age 60. Middle-aged respondents put the threshold closer to 70, and respondents ages 65 and above say that the average person does not become old until turning 74.

Nearly two-thirds of adults ages 18 to 29 believe that when someone "frequently forgets familiar names," that person is old. Less than half of all adults ages 30 and older agree.

Perceived "Old" (% of Survey Respondents)
Said to be old when:	% of Respondents
Turns 85	79%
Can't live independently	76
Can't drive a car	66
Turns 75	62
Forgets familiar names	51
Finds health failing	47
Trouble walking up stairs	45
Bladder control problems	42
Sexually inactive	33
Turns 65	32
Retires	23
Has grandchildren	15
Has gray hair	13
Source: PEW Research Center, June 2009

The survey findings confirm that the older people get, the younger they feel, relatively speaking.

• Among 18- to-29-year-olds, about half say they feel their age, while about quarter say they feel older than their age and another quarter say they feel younger.
• Among adults 65 and older, 60% say they feel younger than their age, compared with 32% who say they feel exactly their age and just 3% who say they feel older than their age.
• Nearly half of all survey respondents ages 50 and older say they feel at least 10 years younger than their chronological age.
• Among respondents ages 65 to 74, a third say they feel 10 to 19 years younger than their age, and one in six say they feel at least 20 years younger than their actual age.

In sync with this upbeat way of counting their felt age, older adults also have a count-my-blessings attitude when asked to look back over the full arc of their lives. Nearly half (45%) of adults ages 75 and older say their life has turned out better than they expected, while just 5% say it has turned out worse (the remainder say things have turned out the way they expected or have no opinion). All other age groups also tilt positive, but considerably less so, when asked to assess their lives so far against their own expectations.

About one in four adults ages 65 and older report experiencing memory loss. About one in five say they have a serious illness, are not sexually active, or often feel sad or depressed. About one in six report they are lonely or have trouble paying bills. One in seven cannot drive. One in ten say they feel they aren't needed or are a burden to others.

But when it comes to these and other potential problems related to old age, the share of younger and middle-aged adults who report expecting to encounter them is much higher than the share of older adults who report actually experiencing them.

Expectations vs. Actual Experience (% of Segment)
Condition	Ages 18-64 Expect	Ages 65+ Experience	Point Gap
Memory loss	57%	25%	32
Not able to drive	45	14	31
Serious illness	42	21	21
Sexually inactive	34	21	13
Sad or depressed	29	20	9
Not needed	29	9	20
Loneliness	29	17	12
Trouble paying bills	24	16	8
Being a burden	24	10	14
Source: PEW Research Center, June 2009

Of all the good things about getting old, the best by far, according to older adults, is being able to spend more time with family members. In response to an open-ended question,

• 28% of those ages 65 and older say that what they value most about being older is the opportunity to spend more time with family
• 25% say that above all, they value time with their grandchildren
• 14% of older adults say having more financial security as what they value most about getting older

But American adults from young to old increasingly disagree today on social values ranging from religion to relationships, creating the largest generation gap since divisions 40 years ago over Vietnam, civil rights and women's liberation.

Asked to identify where older and younger people differ most, 47% said social values and morality. People age 18 to 29 were more likely to report disagreements over lifestyle, views on family, relationships and dating, while older people cited differences in a sense of entitlement. Those in the middle-age groups also often pointed to a difference in manners.

The generation gap in 2009 seems to be more tepid in nature than it was in the 1960s, says the report, when younger people built a defiant counterculture in opposing the Vietnam War and demanding equal rights for women and minorities.

Paul Taylor, director of the Pew Social and Demographic Trends Project, concludes: "... Today, it's more of a general outlook, a different point of view, a general set of moral values..."

Please visit PEW here for a very thorough report on growing older, and access a PDF file.