• There Is Nothing Cool About 'See How Much Food We Put In These Kenmore Refrigerators!'
    Today marks the one-year anniversary of the day we packed up our sense of urban superiority and decamped for the suburbs. And while we love the space and the crickets that chirp us to bed every night, it hasn't been all barbecues and mall-walking, friend.
  • HTC Video Confuses Volume With Impact And Celebrity With Personality
    Short of donning sequined tuxedos, barging into my house at 3 a.m., rousing me to the sights and sounds of a Chumbawumba lip dub and leaving an array of Ukranian nesting dolls in their wake, there is very little anyone in the cell-phone food chain can do to capture my attention. For me, every major manufacturer and carrier passed the marketing saturation point three years ago (related: I am a sports-watching-type person). Brand attributes and handset features alike have long since been laser-etched onto the surface of my brain, and I have long since availed myself of the ones that …
  • Deconstructing Chanel's "Where Beauty Begins"
    Fashion brands have too much money. It should be taken away from them and redistributed to companies that might spend it on something useful or entertaining. Sorry for going all Bolshevik on you, but that's the only takeaway I have after trying to find wit, meaning, personality or depth in "Where Beauty Begins," Chanel's latest video opus.
  • NBC's "An American Coach in London" Mocks English And American Stereotypes Alike
    I am not contrarian by nature. I don't contort myself to assume anti-mainstream poses, or disqualify personalities, programs or anything else just because they're popular ("Oh, so you enjoy writing on vintage typewriters, do you, Mr. Hanks? Can I get you a side of French socialism to go with your pretentious fart sandwich?"). I like what I like. If I have to invent a reason to justify enjoying something - for instance, that the new Kings of Leon album might be listenable because its lead single shares a name with an implement of watery annihilation - it's a sign that …
  • "The Camp Gyno" Brilliantly Introduces Hello Flo Brand To Women
    Unlike many animate beings who do not menstruate, I've always been fascinated with the way marketers of feminine products have danced around the true utility of their wares. Has any other product category so consistently buried the lead ("tampons are wads of absorbent material, such as cotton, which are introduced into body cavities or canals to absorb secretions from menstruation, which is a perfectly normal body function") in a haze of soft-focus metaphor? Has any depicted as many heinous acts of slo-mo beach recreation (horseback riding, hand-holding, shoreline-toeing)? Has any outfitted as many of its ad actors in white linen …