This holiday season, it was important to offer the proper in-person greeting: Extend the hand, web to web. Maintain some sincere eye contact. Two pumps. Release. This is what I learned on the Christmas Eve "Today" show. New salutations are to be learned in the new year for TV writers and producers: Look into the viewers' eyes, extend your hand, and offer up two pumps of sincere TV content.

So what did the Writers Guild of America get from Worldwide Pants anyway? Apparently nothing from TV advertisers, which is the only bit of good news for marketers.

TV writers hate the end of the year. Typically there's little to write about, since everyone is on varying holiday schedules. Few if any major announcements are made. But not this year.